People are far easier to influence than you might imagine. It does not always have to be so challenging to get people to see the world your way. These five tricks will help you achieve more in life in any given circumstance.
In an ideal world we would all get along; however, in reality, we often find ourselves in situations we would like to avoid. Perhaps you have one too many people stopping by your office on any given day and you cannot get your work done. It is important to maintain civil and functional office relationships; therefore, if someone stops by your office during an inconvenient time, walk and talk with them back to their desk. The majority of people will follow you right out of the office and even sit down once you get to their desk. At this point, you can politely say you really need to get back to work and walk away without hurting their feelings.
Surely everyone has been in a situation where they are simply unable to concentrate on what someone else is saying whether they are a particularly boring individual or you only slept a few hours the night prior. One way to make the other person feel as though you are interested is by mirroring their actions. If they cross their arms, you cross your arms. If they rub their chin, you rub your chin. This is a highly effective method of feigning interest.
Sometimes it is difficult to find that common ground on a date. If you struggle with this, get the other person to talk about themselves. Each time they ask you a question, reveal a little something and turn the conversation back around to them. You should also say their name with relative frequency to make them feel special, and if you share something personal and intimate, it will often be reciprocated.
You can persuade people to do just about anything, as long as you initially ask them to do something significantly more demanding. The idea is to ask a friend, colleague, spouse, child, or employee to do something so big that they are certain to say no. Once they say no and you ask them to do what you really want them to do, they will almost always agree to the task out of guilt for having already said no. It is a good thing children have not caught on to this trick.
If you really want to get someone to do something for you or to allow you to do something, get back to basics. Studies have shown that people are far more likely to respond positively to requests if the requester uses please, thank you, and because. People are trained to associate please and thank you with positive actions; therefore, simply using these words will make people like you more and make them more likely to be obliging. If you really want to get what you want, simply use the word because followed by a reason. Studies show that when people ask for a favor or make a request and use because with an explanation nearly 100% of respondents will do what is asked. Of course you should also use a polite and respectful tone along with please and thank you to maximize your chances.
Life is complicated and difficult. By using these simple tricks, your life will be infinitely easier. Now that you are armed these tricks, it is up to you to use your new skills for good rather than for evil.
Jackie Spencer is a clinical psychologist and guest author at SuperScholar.org, where she contributed to the guide to the best online psychology programs.