According to Irish folklore, in an effort to balance the traditional roles of men and women St. Bridget made a deal with St. Patrick which allowed women to propose to men every 4 years on a leap year. Conventionally it has been the man’s responsibility to orchestrate the proposal and this has proved a great deal of frustration for modern women waiting to take the next step.
The romantic notion of being proposed to has been idealistically built up to be one of the most wonderful life experiences a woman can have. The moment where your prince bends down on one knee, vows to spend his life with you, and secures his promise with a token of his adoration for you to flash around at dinner parties until your wrist gets tired.
If you’re not put off by the idea of not being swept off your feet, it might make a nice change to take matters into your own hands and make a move against selective gender equality. Here’s a quick guide as to how to gauge whether or not you’re ready to take the plunge.
Be comfortable
In making this move you’ll have to come to terms with the fact that it is unlikely you will be proposed to. If you’re ok with the idea of losing out on being fussed over in preference to putting the spotlight on him and opening yourself up to being momentarily emotionally vulnerable, there’s every change that you’re ready to go ahead and propose yourself. Make sure you’re completely confident and comfortable before you make the move.
Is He Planning to Propose To You?
If there’s a chance that he’s already got a proposal planned, you could potentially emasculate him by beating him to the punch. Do some nosing. If he’s organised a grand gesture he’ll feel put out if he doesn’t get to pull it off, so just wait. If you can involve one of his friends discreetly so you’ll have more of an insight into what’s going on with your man.
The Proposal
Pick the right time and place. No running on to the field after his casual five-a-side Sunday game and throwing yourself at his feet on the pitch. Make sure your man is enlightened enough to deal with the concept of you proposing and pick somewhere with meaning that matters to the both of you, and discreetly and lovingly pop the question. If he says no, be accepting of the realities and don’t beat yourself up about it. Be gracious and understanding; maybe the timing isn’t right, it doesn’t mean that he doesn’t want to commit to you.
Be sensitive and don’t act out of character. Dress aptly, possibly a slight hint at some sexy lingerie to grab his attention. Prepare for when he says yes, a special bottle of champagne or a surprise celebratory location is a great gesture. Good luck, and enjoy yourself!
If you have any ideas or experiences of the reverse proposal, share with us using the comment box below!
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Elise Lévêque is a bubbly French born writer and bride-to-be. She’s utterly addicted to lingerie, shopping and is well known amongst her friends for having excellent taste!