Furniture. It’s there. You sit on it. You stand on it. Sometimes you eat breakfast off of it.
Sometimes you take it apart and try to put it in your car to move it somewhere else, only to find that the wooden slats weren’t supposed to be removed in the first place and you’ve broken a perfectly good Skärlsnüben and an unfortunate series of events ensues culminating in your forcible removal from the local IKEA, stark naked and covered in motor oil.
Fine, maybe that last one was just me. Whatever.
The point is, as a freelance writer and enthusiastic user of furniture, I write about furniture a lot, and consequently I have come across an awful lot of furniture-related memes, image macros and fails.
These are my favourites, the best of the best, the ones that made me snort hot coffee all over my keyboard. Enjoy!
DO NOT SIT IN CHAIRS
Unless you are sitting in chairs.
The worst part is that this wasn’t a mistake.
These Aren’t My Glasses
And the worst part of this is that there is Rule 34 of it.
A lot of Rule 34, you guys. Apparently a lot of things can be substituted for chairs, who knew?
This is not how you chair.
Boat? What Boat?
I was just out sanding my table when suddenly I tripped over and attached an outboard motor.
What do you mean, permit? I just told you what happened.
This particular fail is painfully familiar to anyone who has ever owned a sofa bed.
The problem with owning a large, mechanical piece of furniture that you only ever use by entrusting your entire body’s weight to it is that you are entrusting your entire body’s weight to a large mechanical piece of furniture.
What made me laugh out loud rather than nod wisely and mutter, “I’ve been there, my friend”, was the expression on the guy’s face.
It’s the kind of expression you see on a cast member of the Blair Witch Project. Or possibly Saw. This is a man who has never had to deal with a situation so remorselessly horrifying as a sofa-bed collapsing before.
Presumably the entire rest of his life was spent in that bed. Presumably he waited as it became a trusted friend, an ally, confidant, possibly even a lover. He’d grown up with it, ever since it was just a tiny kids bed dreaming its impossible bed-like dreams. Then one day, on the very day as ol’ Indiscrete Joe paid a visit, on the one day that he was eager to show you his cool new camera, it betrayed him.
Only this can explain the extent of that look of despairing anguish on his face.
Furniture memes are surprisingly common, especially fails. There’s a whole lot of ways furniture can go wrong!
Why not link to your own favourite furniture-based memes in the comments?
Don’t actually answer that, just, y’know, post links if you’ve got ’em!
Estelle Page writes blog posts for Your Furniture Online, an online furniture store with a wide range of quality, value furniture.